Perspective, Empathy, and Thoughts From A Grandfather
One of the hardest things about being in the quarantine/COVID-19 world we currently live in is realizing that you having your own experience together with the world. That was a funny sentence to type, but allow me to explain a little deeper: We are all individuals having an experience at the same time.
It reminds me of going to a dinner party with my wife. We leave the party and immediately begin to debrief only to realize that we were at the same place having two completely different experiences.
This season of life feels a lot like that to me. And the even harder part of this idea is that I can’t imagine the generational differences. My kids are experiencing a different season than I am, and my parents are experiencing something completely different than both of us.
Brene Brown is quoted as saying, “Empathy is communicating that incredibly healing message of, ‘You’re not alone.’”
So today I want to invite us to listen for empathy’s sake. And to help with that task I feel incredibly honored to have a guest post on the blog today.
David Day is a husband, father, and grandfather. He is an Indiana attorney and a graduate of Harvard Law. I’ve had the privilege to get to know him a bit, and (aside from his undying support of Purdue Football) have found his insights invaluable. He is also a Christ follower who cares deeply about the next generation.
I am grateful for his thoughts on what it is like as an older American in this pandemic.
Written by David Day
Remember that the family that everyone recognizes as so important now has very much changed for us. My physical family in this isolation is my wife and me. We stood on the porch and watched our two younger grandchildren play in our front yard but handing them a cookie, holding them on our laps and reading them a book, and the good-bye hug are not there. Never take the importance of touch for granted. For those who no longer have a spouse, the isolation has to be even more challenging.
Technology is wonderful and we are very blessed that we are young enough to have some technical skills. If parents/grandparents are in their late 70's or older, they did not "grow up" with technology as much in their lives and they are probably dependent on those children and grandchildren who cannot come around as much to solve their technical problems. They can feel very left out as they watch people on tv talk about the wonders of technology.
It is a bit of a shock to recognize that you are in the high-risk category. Prior to the virus, people were often talking about how 60 was the new 40 and 70 the new 50. But now if you are over 60, people are being told that extra precautions must be taken around you. Suddenly you can feel old and vulnerable.
The economic issues hit us on three levels: our personal situation, the employment issues are children may be facing and, depending on the age of our grandchildren, the job prospects for them as they leave high school and college. And the rapidity of the change is jarring.
Usually, we are looked to because, if nothing else, we have life experience that we can share as wisdom. But we are now in a situation that none of us have ever faced. We can feel helpless because we think we have nothing to offer as guidance.
Sometimes taking the time to listen can be the hardest part about empathy and perspective. I am thankful for David ‘s thought and for you taking the time to read them!
If there is any way I can be praying for you please don’t hesitate to let me know. We are all having individual experiences - together.